Last night as I was just on the verge of falling into a nice restfull night's sleep, when it dawned on me, yes another brilliant idea. Here goes... I believe that sometimes you have to believe that you are just going to barely make it through in order to actually make it through, and realize how truly wonderful life is. Despite all of life's setbacks, letdowns, broken relationships, knives in the back, and all around crappy situations people always find a way to keep going. We always find a way to survive even if that means barely making it through because in the end we can turn around and say, "Ya, I went through that, and you know what I made it to the other side." And in those moments we find people to help who are not quite unlike ourselves, and we offer them a hand and a shoulder to lean on. It seems that sometimes you have to go through something extremely difficult in order to learn a little humanity, learn a little compassion and humility. When you think about it we can't be nearly as alone as we all think we are, so maybe if we all got up the courage to talk about those times we just barely made it through we would find someone just like us. We learn some great lessons in our times of utter desperation, and sometimes just getting by is all we can do. Then we finally break the surface and get a breath of fresh air, and we remember what living is all about... That's it my brilliant revelation.
Peace, Jensen
It's in these late hours
When the night is at its peak
When dawn is on the brink
Of breakin' through
That all these emotions get stirred
And now comes the pivotal point
When you don't need to bleed
Just to feel alive
You're not going to beg and plead
Not anymore
You're breakin' through this endless darkness
Comin' out to see the light
The sun kisses you're cheeks
For the first time in weeks
Now this you know
Is truly being alive
So, I was reading through some of my old poetry a couple of days ago, and this is one of the poems that totally jumped out at me... Writing is one of my main outlets, for every season in my life there is a thick stack of papers with words passionately scribbled across them. I realized though that I have truly turned a new page over in my life, I'm startin' out on an adventure, not knowing how it's going to turn out, maybe this will be one of the best things to ever happen or maybe I'll end up heartbroken. I don't really care how it all ends up, well I want it to end well, but I'm just gonna sit back and enjoy the ride. I am walking out of the darkness that I have grown so accustomed to, and throwing my self head first into life, and I intend to truly enjoy it, no more sleepless nights, no more pain. Granted I can't live on this little high forever, but I'm going to enjoy it while it lasts. You never know what living is until you open yourself up to be hurt, until you truly expose yourself, don't leave anything hidden. Yes, you'll get hurt, but find that someone to cling to, who'll be there to help you up even when you stab each other in the back. Those are the people worth keeping around. I had forgotten how much fun being happy was, there's no stopping me now ;P... well there is my random little ramblings...
Peace, Jensen